“Show up. Be seen. Answer the call to courage. Because you are worth being brave,” says Brené Brown in her Netflix special The Call to Courage.
Inspired by Brown, I came up with a Courage Project for the women in the Beacons of Change Inner Circle online sisterhood.
I asked my beacons—and now I am asking you—the following question:
What is your personal call to courage right now? In other words, what is one behavior, one default response to being triggered, that you now have the courage to start shifting to a new behavior?
Here are the courage statements our beacons came up with.
My call to courage is choosing:
- Connection over isolation
- Asking for help over doing it all on my own
- Understanding over frustration
- Empowerment over defeat
- Hope over anger
- Neutral conversations and listening effectively
- Empathy over blame
- Calm and collected thoughts over reacting to a situation
What is your current call to courage? Write it down and keep reading…because I am going to share practical ways to turn your statement into a real shift.
Bring your courage statement to life.
To get started on making your courage statement real, ask yourself this question:
What have I done in the past that helped me choose ________ over _______?
For example, one of the women in my sisterhood is an empath. (Many of us are empaths. Are you? Take the Empath Quiz and find out!) She created the following statement:
I choose boundaries over people pleasing.
When I asked her the question, she said right away, “I listened to my body. As soon as I felt tightness in my stomach, I knew that I was trying to please others. I reminded myself how much better it feels in my body when I stand strong in my boundaries.”
Looking at the success she had in the past helped her to create a formula for success in the present moment.
Start your day with a heart-centered connection.
Make your courage statement a morning mantra, and integrate it into your daily routine.
Write your courage statement down on a sticky note, index card, or your mirror. Say it out loud and FEEL it. Really feel it: I CHOOSE________ OVER ________.
Ask yourself: What is one thing I can do today to live by my courage statement?
Then close your eyes for a few minutes. If you practice Reiki, call in the symbols and ask Reiki to guide you. If you don’t practice Reiki, ask the universe, God, or your Inner Goddess to guide you. Be silent for a few minutes and listen. Allow the answer to emerge.
Go against your norm.
Your norm is your default. You get used to doing it, and it becomes your comfort zone. Doubting. Not asking for help. Worrying. Isolating. Different people have different norms.
Being a beacon and reconnecting with the light gives you the strength to do things against your norm.
Make it your focus for today.
I choose_________ over __________. I commit to doing things against my norm.
Throughout the day, whenever you want to challenge yourself, ask what you can do right now that would be against your norm.
If your norm is doubting, what can you do to create hope?
If your norm is shutting down, what can you do to open up?
Surprise yourself and be brave. Do things against your norm.
Choose a reminder for your courage statement.
As you start shifting from an old behavior to a new one, it is human to fall back into your comfort zone when you’re triggered. You want to ask for help, but you find yourself trying to do it all by yourself. You want to set boundaries, but you find yourself people pleasing again. You want to be at peace, but worry takes over.
Wear a bracelet or a ring so that every time you recognize the old behavior, touching and playing with the bracelet or the ring will remind you to shift. Turn the ring around your finger while chanting, “I choose ______ over______.” You can do the same thing with a movement. Every time you recognize the old behavior, snap or touch your ear while chanting your courage statement. Touch a crystal you carry in your pocket, or connect with an image you carry in your mind and chant your courage statement. Bring joy and creativity into the process of reprogramming your mind.
Decide what kind of help you need.
One thing that can help you be successful with your Courage Project is getting other people to support you. One of the purposes of the Inner Circle sisterhood is to provide support. The beacons in the sisterhood know that healing together outshines healing alone.
Ask yourself what kind of support you need.
Would you like to ask a person who knows you well to describe you when you are triggered?
Is it best for you to find a guide or a professional to help you be successful with the change you are trying to create?
Are you ready to find your tribe, a tribe of like-minded women who live bravely together?
But STOP collecting evidence that backs up old, automatic, default tendencies that you’d like to change.
Instead START collecting evidence that proves the courage statement you are intentionally choosing to create because you’re tired of self-sabotaging, and you know that these new tendencies reflect the person you really are.
Every time you notice an old behavior throughout the day, say to yourself, “Interesting!” Let it go. Don’t give it any energy or attention. Instead, pay attention to moments when you shift to the new behavior.
Make a list (in your journal or at least in your head) of the small wins you had throughout the day with choosing ________ over _________.
Your courage statement is all your own. But if you’re feeling extra brave, I’d love to hear about your call to courage. Send me a note to let me know how you plan to turn it into a real shift, and I’ll respond with my support.