Whether you’re a full-time mom or a career woman, you probably strive to create work-life balance. There’s so much to do and we’re always pushing ourselves to work harder. For many women, taking care of themselves is pushed to the end of the list, while other people and work have priority. The result is that every time they take a break or do something fun, they feel guilty.

One of my coaching clients homeschools her kids. She spends most hours of the day with them, every day. She has no reason to feel guilty for taking time off for herself, but she does. We decided to change this. Her commitment this week was to plan an hour every day where her husband would watch the kids while she did something she enjoys by herself.

One day, she watched a movie. Another day, she listened to her favorite inspiring radio show. Another day she took a walk. She had to plan it ahead, to make arrangements with her husband, to explain the new habit to her kids and to choose her activity. She also had to do some internal work of identifying the beliefs and thinking that usually prevent her from doing all of that. She did all of the above and was very happy with the results.

She was able to slow down, to clear her head and she felt a lot more focused than before. She noticed she had more patience and was nicer to her husband and kids after enjoying time by herself. Her kids actually like the idea of having “me-time” and one of the sons told his brother: “Mom is having mom’s time, don’t disturb her.”

When you take time to do something for yourself, something that you want to do because you enjoy it, not because you have to, you’ll benefit and so will the people around you.

The Bottom Life: Plan “me time” in advance

Ask: what do I love doing and how would I feel if I had this time for myself?

Affirm: I create “me-time” in my life and I am centered, calm and focused.